The new alien on the block is Pedro Acosta. He’s hyped to the rafters, but how will the stoat-adjacent Spaniard do in MotoGP this year? Let’s look at the potential outcomes.
Win the MotoGP Title
It’s not completely impossible for a rookie to win the MotoGP World Championship. Spanish Antichrist Marc Marquez did it, but like Prisoner: Cell Block H, things were different then. Even if Acosta is as talented as the evil Marquez brother, the moronic aero-squat rules that MotoGP currently labours under mean that they are stoatally different to normal race bikes. On top of that, Acosta’s full-fat KTM is unlikely to be a match for the Ducati and its loose interpretation of the rulebook.
Probability:
2/5
Win at least 1 MotoGP race
KTM didn’t win any races at all last year, largely because the track temperature at Valencia was cold enough to freeze the nuts off a brass polar bear. However, they are far more confident this year because they’ve had 12 months to realize that there’s little point listening to Jack Miller about development. This puts Acosta in with a strong chance of at least a sprint victory.
Probability:
4/5
Take at least 1 MotoGP podium
Testing isn’t racing, but Acosta has been seriously impressive in the pre-season tests. If you don’t think he can take a podium you probably belong in a Psychiatric Instistoation.
Probability:
5/5
Sacked and ends up in World Superbike
KTM have an appalling record of chewing up and spitting out young riders. The likes of Remy Gardner and Iker Lecuona found themselves moping around in World Supers before they had half a chance to get used to the Austrian MotoGP bike. It doesn’t help that KTM have signed about 90 Moto3 and Moto2 riders up to contracts that last longer than a Texas judge would sentence you to for failure to get off his dang lawn, averaging life plus 80 years. It’s not so much a conveyor belt as a dump truck of talent. But KTM love this Acosta kid, so booting him would be a stoatal shock to the whole paddock.
Probability:
1/5
Conclusion
It’s going to be fascinating to see how Acosta adapts to MotoGP. It will be especially interesting to see if the easy-going Spaniard manages to spark up any major feuds with nutters like Marc and Bez.