The experts told us it wouldn’t happen. Then they told us again just in case we’d forgotten. But we didn’t. Instead we secretly kept hoping that something interesting could happen this season and finally it has…
Next year the Spanish Antichrist will be joining his brother and riding for Gresini Ducati. This move involved him buying himself out of his current Repsol Honda contract – proving that the HRC machine is such a heap of crap it’s worth giving up millions of pounds to ride a year old bike with a different manufacturer.
But as we rub our hands with the prospect of next year being slightly interesting let’s spare a thought for the bitter yellow minority who have been throwing themselves in front of buses and swallowing copious amounts of olive stones at the news. Here’s why it’s been such a terrible day in parts of Italy…
Winning
Marquez’s none-winning streak has been a source of mass entertainment for the bitter yellow army – what better way to enjoy a sport than to mock someone that’s not performing well. (Unless it’s Bradley Smith of course). The problem with this enjoyment is that the relative misery that will be caused if the Spaniard wins races will be multifold.
If Marc is as good as he used to be then he will win races on the vintage Ducati. Unless the hapless Luca Marini hospitalises him that is. And the idea of such a victory will be causing mammoth twitches in the balloon knot location of the sour-faced subset.
Beating the current Ducati riders
Let’s not beat around the bush – if any of the current crop of mediocre Ducati riders were on any other bike they’d not be winning or pushing for a podium. To win races in MotoGP you need a Ducati…or maybe a KTM on the days it decides to show up.
If Marc starts beating the current crop of Ducati riders it will belittle the last two years proving our once great sport was actually the Ducati cup. Furthermore beating Bagnaia, and whoever wins the title this year, will devalue their championships and probably cause a huge rift to split through the Bolognaise camp.
Winning on a different manufacturer
Back in 2019, when it looked like Marquez was set to win more championships than Valentino Rossi, the bitter fans slumbered up onto the tear-soaked soapboxs with one trembling finger held up high claiming that the Spaniard would never achieve the greatness of their hero as he’d only won with the same manufacturer.
If, and it’s a huge if, Marquez does win the championship with Ducati then this greasy straw being desperately clutched to will slip through their salty grasp.
Uccio’s VR46 Team
Uccio, whose father was choked to death by Princess Leia, runs the Valentino Rossi VR46 MotoGP team. This team has Rossi’s brother in it along with a rider that actually deserves to be in MotoGP. For the bitter fans this is the greatest team in MotoGP – it’s even yellow to match their endless ‘46’ stickers and stripe down their back.
Marc will be joining his brother Alex at Gresini – making it a Marquez Ducati team. And Team VR46 being beaten by a Marquez Team is a depressing prospect that could see them hanging from the trees.
Winning on a Ducati
The Ducati is a different machine to when Rossi comically attempted to ride it. But a win on the Italian eyesore by Marc, achieving something the number 46 rider couldn’t, will be one more small cut to add to the list.
It’s been a bad week…
Today’s been bad for the bitter yellow fans…but it’s also been a bad week! Here’s why…
For several years Valentino Rossi has run a training camp at his Neverland Ranch in Italy. He houses and nurtures the best and most attractive young Italian riders pushing them both on the bike and into unscheduled sleepovers. Almost all the current Italian MotoGP riders have come through the academy – except Enea Bastianini who’s bones were correctly deemed as being ‘too brittle’ to kneel daily in front of the golden Rossi statue.
Since Rossi’s demise from the sport the hostile yellow-fans have skilfully used any victory from a VR46 academy rider as a direct win for Rossi himself. Victory by proxy. And a great way to keep the former champion relevant instead of moving on.
A few rounds ago it looked set in stone that the Italian stunt driver and academy rider Pecco Bagnaia would cruise to his second championship. His only real rival was Marco Bezzecchi…who, thankfully, was also an academy rider.
But then came the Martinator…
Jorge Martin isn’t really on the yellow-hate list as yet, but he’s bordering very precariously. Firstly he’s Spanish – and as we all know Dorna have a massive bias towards their own kin – how else can Lorenzo’s 2015 championship be explained?
Far more pressing though is that for some reason Martin is now challenging Bagnaia for the title after winning 5 of the last 6 races…and coming second in the other. Meanwhile Bagnaia has been falling to pieces like a week old Bimota V Due.
The idea of Jorge Martin winning the championship, stealing it away from the VR46 riders, had already been making this week pretty poor…