Winners
Moto3
People who spout that “Moto3 is where the real excitement is” are often branded as the same kind of pompous tits who also enjoy to claim “the book is miles better than the film”. No one cares.
But, at the risk of self-sacrifice, the Moto3 race really was yet again the standout race of the weekend.
Jake Dixon
Jake’s the classic British rider – popular with the journalists, is regularly ‘almost great’ and falls off a lot.
There’s been a lot of talk of Dixon joining the factory Yamaha MotoGP team next season because:
- Morbidelli desperately needs a Ducati to not look dog shit
- He’s mates with Quartarararo
- No one else wants to ride the Yamaha nail
But before Assen the Englishman had never won a Moto2 race. He’d often come close, but then fallen off. Dixon really needed a win to cement his intent. And that’s exactly what he did.
Jake’s win was no fluke either. He was just faster than everyone else – including the much-lauded part-stoat Pedro Acosta.
As we enter the summer break it was the perfect time to not fall off and instead win.
Ducati
The dominance of Ducati is a worry. It’s not their fault that they bent the rules to win. But now the rules are lost in paperwork and the Japs are nowhere near winning and getting less-near with each race. More worrying is that if the honourable Japanese firms have taught us anything it’s that quitting is always an option. Especially for ‘let’s quit F1 again’ Honda.
Sunday naps
MotoGP can often be likened to the creation of the universe. Everything starts close together but, after a very short period of chaotic uncertainty, all matter moves away from all other matter uniformly into the vast void with very infrequent interactions.
So getting some weekend shut-eye is the ideal time whilst the MotoGP race is plodding along. And there’s no better feeling than waking up groggy late afternoon on a Sunday knowing you’ll now not be able to sleep that night.
Losers
Brad Binder
In the sprint race Binder thought he’d finished third only to have his position dropped for a last lap track-limits infringement. The giraffe shooting KTM rider was obviously gutted but amended that in the main event by learning his lesson and finishing third only to have his position dropped for a last lap track-limits infringement.
The sizable Binder fanclub (which includes the screeching fanboy Gavin Emmett) were aggressively waving biltong around in anger claiming that if he’d have been Spanish he’d have been let off. Of course this is absolute nonsense, given all the other penalties being issued throughout the weekend, but it’s good to know that the internet still has a healthy set of blinkered ignoramuses filling in the lost Yellow46 spaces.
Aero
Big wings. Small wings. Little wings stuck to big wings. Little wings stuck to something else. Recently MotoGP machines, led by Ducati, have been a testament to superglue with endless aero devices being introduced at each race. And they’re critical to the performance of a modern MotoGP bike…or are they?
Without a doubt wings have helped ruin the racing pulling MotoGP into the once mocked realms of F1 as riders struggle to follow rivals. But Aprilia’s journeyman Aleix Espargaro managed his best result of the season, a third, with half of the bike’s main wing limply dangling around haphazardly like an infected haemorrhoid.
So what’s the point? Who knows? What we do know is aero is impossible to ban with Ducati’s lawyers having mastered how to claim a huge carbon aerofoil stuck on their bike is there to help cool the rider’s ankles.
Marc Marquez
A bruised, broken and battered Marc started the weekend hating Honda and claiming he was only in Holland to make up the numbers and cream off the best parts of the buffet.
In the sprint race the ex-champion confirmed this by disappointingly finishing 17th and not hospitalising anyone. Not the Marc we know and absolutely love/hate (delete as applicable). The antichrist seemed uninterested in the event which was most unlike the Honda rider.
What wasn’t unlike Marquez though was his ability to fall off. And, despite going slow, he was still no match for the evilly hacked together RC213V which he fell off in morning practice and cracked a couple of ribs.
So once again, he skipped work.
Penalties
If aero is punching our sport in the face then moronic penalties are simultaneously kicking it in the spleen. At Assen we had bucket loads more penalties. Some legit, others plain stupid. Added to that the penalties all seemed inconsistent and possibly chosen by a big spinning wheel in the stewards office.
How were the half-baked Dutch crowd with their Max Verstappen flags ever supposed to understand what was going on without getting their clogs in a twist?