Continuing our coverage of the Bradleygate saga, we ask if Bradders is the Ringo Starr of MotoGP.
Recap
The Bradleygate scandal started when Bradley Smith allegedly failed to show up for a promised wildcard appearance in the GP2 category of British Supersport. The Spirit Motorcycles team expressed their extreme disappointment in this no-show. What really hurt was that they had shelled out nearly £30 on a lightly scraped set of 2nd hand crash bungs off eBay especially.
Why Bradders rather than someone who’s any good?
Having a former Moto2 rider turned MotoGP “star” turned team-owner riding their machine would be a major coup for an up and coming company, if he showed up as allegedly promised.
How did Bradley get to MotoGP anyway?
It’s believed that Dorna were involved. (Sinister organ music at this point). The owners of the MotoGP championship are said to shell out money to teams who agree to run riders from various non-Spanish and non-Italian countries in the hope of increasing their TV viewership.
Did British TV viewers demand the arrival of Bradders in the top class of racing?
Of course not. Bradders went to race in Spain at an early age, so the vast majority of British fans didn’t know or care who he was.
Who did the British fans want, then?
They wanted the same as MotoGP fans around the world. Valentino Rossi!!! One glance at the crowd at a British MotoGP race is enough to see the tsunami of yellow that swamps the event every year. The yellowmongering hordes didn’t know or care who Bradders was either. (Or much else apart from Valentino’s race number and favourite colour).
And the fans who actually know about MotoGP, who did they want to see?
The knowledgeable fans wanted to see Valentino Rossi! They just acted all cool about it so nobody would mistake them for a Rossi Muppet with day-glo yellow bedclothes and yellow towels in the bathroom and an overweight cat called Uccio and all that.
Why would Dorna want Bradley in MotoGP, then?
The British TV companies demanded it. Well, they didn’t demand Bradders in particular, they demanded any British rider. It gives the commentators something to talk about in a boring race. Instead of falling asleep and snoring live on air they can say, “And Bradley Smith is going well in 14th place, just 8 seconds behind the guy in front and only lapping 6 tenths a lap slower”.
Is Bradley Smith the Ringo Starr of MotoGP?
Good question. Let’s talk about Ringo for a moment. He can’t play the drums, isn’t much of a singer and his song writing abilities are non-existent. So in that sense, his musical skills are similar to Bradley’s riding and especially overtaking skills. However, Ringo is a popular guy with a dry wit. And although he can’t technically play the drums, he does have a natural sense of rhythm that’s highly rated by a who’s who list of famous drummers. That means Ringo is more like a motorcycle racer who isn’t going to win any championships, but is a really nice guy and has a stupid but spectacular riding style that the fans love. Someone like, I dunno, Ruben Xaus or something. In other words, Bradley Smith is not the Ringo Starr of MotoGP.
So what musician is closest to Bradders, then?
Someone who’s an unknown journeyman without too much personality or conspicuous talent. Maybe one of those revolving door nobodies that Axl Rose hired for Guns n Roses after the talented ones all left. They know the songs and aren’t going to play many bum notes, but the fans don’t really notice them. Everyone’s there to see Axl, not some random bass player.